No one has actually begun trying to drag them in kicking and screaming yet, but Nato Chief de Hoop Scheffer and US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice have repeated their request for Germany to send six Tornado surveillance jets to southern Afghanistan.

“Six,” said de Hoop Scheffer, holding up six fingers to journalists. “S-i-x as in five plus one? Here, let me write that down for you to avoid any further confusion.” “Planes,” added Condi as she wildly flapped her arms about like a big skinny bird, which she actually is. “Tornado surveillance-type jet planes, got it? Sie verstehen mich already?”

The two made their comments during a meeting of NATO foreign ministers in Brussels yesterday. It was also announced here that NATO commanders are now planning an offensive against the Taliban in the coming weeks and that many of these military experts believe having a few of these German high-tech Wunderwaffen wonders would be “a way cool and wonderful thing.”

“NATO would reeeally appreciate a German decision to send these Tornados,” added de Hoop Scheffer. “It would be a veeery positive step forward, know what I’m sayin’?” Rice then upped the ante by announcing that the US will also be sending more than 10 billion dollars in reconstruction aid to Afghanistan over the next two years, “reconstruction” being one of the few words know to man that a German can ever resist.

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