It’s true! Would hysterical conservatives lie to you about a Godless Muslim Koran-fondling wild man like Scary Barry? A man who doesn’t always wear a flag pin on his lapel? That was mighty careless of him. You’d think the Anti-Christ would be a little more devious than that. Since Christ was clearly a white American, you know HE’D wear the correct lapel pin!!!

You’ve all surely read by now that Obama is indeed the Anti-Christ. The Bible says so!!! It says that a Muslim in his 40’s will come from the east and deceive people with nice speeches. Hillary says the same thing!!! I can’t find any of that in the Bible, and Mohammed wasn’t even born until several hundred years after the Bible was written, but Hawaii is about as far east as you can get, right???

Oooooh, and all those scary pictures of Obama dressed in African garb. That proves he’s a TERRORIST!!! Gee, I just hope he didn’t get his picture taken in a Stetson while he was in Texas. Somebody might think he’s a COWBOY!!! And since cowboys are mentioned in the Bible exactly the same number of times as Muslims (zero), that would further undermine his status as the Anti-Christ. We’d have to find a new one, maybe Rush Limbaugh.

Chris Matthews claims he felt electricity run up his leg the first time he heard Obama speak. That was no electrical charge, Chris. That was a demon sent to take over your mind. Better pay attention to that, or Beelzebub will be using the Kremlin to broadcast subversive radio messages to your brain!!!

I saw a picture of Barack HUSSEIN Obama’s relatives, and HALF OF THEM ARE BLACK!!!!!! And his momma married a BLACK MAN!!! If Obama moves into the White House . . . . [whispered: Well,  you know how THOSE people are–there goes the neighborhood.]

I’m a little confused, though. A few years ago, the End-of-the-World crowd was telling us that Saddam HUSSEIN was the Anti-Christ, but he has rope burns around his neck now, and he has the added liability of being dead. Can’t make nice speeches anymore. And he wasn’t in his 40’s. Gorbachev got to be Anti-Christ before that, but then he went and spoiled everything by tearing down the Berlin Wall and moving to America. No big deal, his speeches weren’t that hot anyway, but I still wonder about that “mark of the beast” on his head, so he’s got some explaining to do. Before that, Madalyn Murray O’Hair was the Anti-Christ, but she wasn’t a man and she wasn’t from the east like Obama, and she wasn’t a Muslim. Some people used to think Soviet Premier Khrushchev was the Anti-Christ, but he got forced into early retirement by the Soviet government to make room for the new Anti-Christ, Leonid Brezhnev. I think Hitler served one term as Anti-Christ, but the Bible says nothing about him being German and losing a world war. Then on his last day in office he shot himself in the mouth. No more speeches.

Maybe the real Anti-Christ moves around from person to person. You know, he’ll be in one person until that person dies, then he tries to seat himself in someone else. Kind of like musical chairs for evil spirits. Then the person who gets the last chair gets to be Anti-Christ for Life. Maybe it will be President-for-Life Vlad Putin, who I predict will get to serve at least one term as the A-C, even though he’s in his 50’s, he’s not Muslim, and his speeches suck.

One thing I’m not confused about, though. If someone sends me an email about somebody I don’t like or know, or who scares me, I get a free pass to lie. Especially if it has to do with GOD or COUNTRY or BOTH. It’s okay to slander another human being through the miraculous speed of the world wide net. It doesn’t matter that Jesus himself said that the devil is a liar and the father of all lies (John 8:44, if you wanna take a break from your emails).

This just in: On November 22, 1963, toddler Barack HUSSEIN Obama was clinging bitterly to his gun on the grassy knoll !!!!


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