Bloody New Year

A group of friends, killing an afternoon at a local carnival, mistakenly taunt a trio of carnies. After fighting and fleeing from said carnies, the group hightails it from the carnival (with an extra girl for formerly single Spud in tow), and heads to the beach for an afternoon sailing adventure. After crashing into a rock, the sextet wades ashore to a nearby island. Fearing themselves shipwrecked on a deserted island, the group is ecstatic to find a resort hotel, pristine and picturesque, and still decorated for New Years Eve. Exploring their new found refuge, weirdness begins as random voices and sounds echo throughout the empty hotel, and he boogeymen begin spring up in unsuspecting places.

Leaving no holiday unscathed, the horror genre has a movie for just about any holiday you can dream up. For me, New Years is mostly a forgotten holiday that means an extra day off and beer. With low expectations, I opted for this low scale holiday farce, figuring it should be a suitable distraction considering the lazy holiday New Years tends to be.

Since my expectations were low to begin with, I managed to escape this confused beast of a flick with little to no disappointment. Fearing the worst, I was given what was expected. Standing out as a glaring example of plot cohesion and fluidity gone bad, Bloody New Year is a hard one to follow. There is little that makes sense throughout this film, aside from ‘they’re gonna die!!!’ as we bounce along disjointedly from one deadly scenario to another.

As the plot finally takes hold and starts to chug along, it first appears we’re going to be in for a ghost story. With haunting giggles and laughter and spectral party music popping up at random times, it seemed fitting that an empty hotel on a deserted island could in fact be haunted, so far, so good. As we move along to the first jump scene of our film, we see a sheik on an ancient film reel leap from the screen to wreak havoc and mayhem. Again, haunted hotel, semi cool ghost affect, allrighty, now we’re starting to churn. Now we jump to our first separated couple, exploring a fishing shack near the beach. Attacked by a moving fishing net? Well, now you’re stretching it a bit.

From this point on, Bloody New Year proceeds to unfold into a muddled mess of blood and gore, attempting to wow us with their over the top kills and creativity. While trying to out do any other film with their over the top violence and story line, we become mired as they begin to carry the plot in too many directions at once. Throughout the film they try and deliver a back-story to what has happened to the hotel on a small black and white TV in one of the motel. Attention grabbing at first, this soon becomes lost in the background as our victims begin to come back for blood. As they try and stretch the limits of their version of supernatural, the haunting becomes comical, which indeed kills any atmosphere they had managed to build up to his point. (Which was effectively zero) Running from laughing bushes? Ghosts who destroy a room only to clean it up as the scene runs again in reverse? Riding about on a pool table as you are chased through a room by a haunted pinball machine? Perhaps impressive (well, maybe not impressive) on their own, but thrown together in an over packed hour and half, I’m too busy laughing at you to make it too scary.

Ham handed acting rounds out this crapfest, making this an official beer night film to enjoy with all of your soused friends. With carnies that remind me of Lenny and Squiggy and characters for each cliché of the day, it’s even harder to take this film seriously. Pretty girl who screams at the drop of a hat, survivor tomboyish girl, bossy girl who appears a bit motherly in attitude and appearance, Sporto, Whipped Boyfriend and ba-dum-dum-tsk Hay I’m A Comedian guy all round out our group of unfortunates.

In the end, I honestly don’t feel all that fortunate to have seen this flick, and I really don’t feel that I would have missed out on much had I let it slip past my radar. Hard to recommend to anyone but if you are a fan of confusion and random deaths, this may be right up your ally!

All in all, it made me feel much like this.

2 screamy pretty girls out of 5

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