Anarchists and civil rights activists alike were pleasantly surprised at just how much Zurückhaltung (restraint) German cops have been showing while getting the crap kicked out of them during the pre-G8 summit warm-up riots which are being held this weekend in Rostock. Approximately 430 police officers were injured during the violent street battles that took place yesterday between militant activists and not-heavily-armed-enough Polizei forces.

“Honestly, we had no idea what wussies they would be,” said one masked non-German radical who had flown in for some weekend fun. “I mean, you have this vague picture in your head about what a German cop should be like. I don’t know, like maybe black leather and Gestapo or something. But these guys are ridiculous. I don’t think they even let them use live ammunition here. I’ll be staying the whole week now.”

The clashes, in which protesters predictably threw stones and set cars alight, occurred after a largely peaceful and thoroughly boring march (they always are, I mean do, don’t they?) through downtown Rostock by thousands of anti-globalization Weltverbesserer (do-gooders). Police then used water cannon and tear gas to carefully disperse the do-gooders from the infinitely more interesting violent wacko types and then proceeded to let themselves be systematically drubbed and trounced by them.

“Very impressive,” said another protester. “At first we figured that trying to get violent here would be a complete waste of time. But after seeing this, I can hardly wait until the summit begins on Wednesday.”

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