It has been a while since my last culinary adventure, I was ready! My wife recently dragged me out on a mega grocery shopping trip. I don’t mind the occasional trip to the megamart, it offers an opportunity to seek out new strange and unusual items to experiment with! Jan of course does not share my interest in the unknown.

I do not claim to know every cut of meat on every type of meat, but I have an open mind. While Jan was perusing the meat aisle I noticed a couple of dirt cheap packages of beef labeled Chimichurri Beef Shoulder Steak. It was a cut that I was not familiar with, and the price was right!

Well that was what the label said! We were in a bit of a rush, but I can’t resist a deal. For under $4 I got two packs labeled as Chimichuri Beef Shoulder Steak. I like cheap, cheap is my favorite price! I tossed them in the shopping cart and went on to explore the other delights that the megamart might have to offer. For fun I asked the Fish Department if they had any Craster Kippers? It goes without saying that they did not. But kudos to the employee, he at least had heard the word Kipper and led me to the canned Tuna and Sardine section. So armed with two flat tins of Kippered Snacks I was all set!

Back at home it was the usual controlled disaster of getting stuff out of plastic bags and into their (almost) final resting place. Today I found myself with some ‘down time’ (OK that translates into) Jan wasn’t around and so I can do whatever I want. Well, until she gets back! I decided it was time to discover what a Chimichurri Beef Shoulder Steak was all about.

I had done some research on Chimichurri, and I liked what I read. This is a cut of beef that is tougher than shoe leather. What is not to love? Marinade it for 6 weeks in Battery Acid and Bleach, well you have cracked the problem! Of course when I checked the kitchen supplies I realized that Jan had let the supply of Battery Acid and Bleach run out.

I was not worried, maybe I could persuade my step son Joey to run over the meat a couple of times with his car. This in my opinion might have been an interesting adventure, Meat tenderized by a large car and marinated by very loud obnoxious music.

Alas my hopes were dashed. I know what a beef rib looks like. I happen to like them. These two packages were about as Chimichurri as a Ham Sandwich at a Jewish wedding!

Second part to this epicurean adventure soon.

Simon Barrett

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