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Pope Benedict XVI, well-known the world over for his inflammatory remarks and hostile motives, has got the Muslim world up in arms again (figuratively, for the moment) after making statements that could possibly be construed to imply that maybe somehow there is a just possibly, as in conceivably, a connection between Islam and violence. I mean, like how far-fetched and inflammatory is that?

What is worse, this Muslim outrage has now outraged Germany. Sort of.

Granted, getting the Muslim world up in arms (figuratively or literally) doesn’t take much days, but it looks like now you can even do so by being the pacifist in person and giving some dry, theological dissertation using quotes from some obscure writings of an even more obscure 14th century Christian emperor that nobody has even heard of before. Well, nobody I hang out with ever heard of him.

Yup, the calls are coming in. You know, those we’re offended because we never tire of saying how innocent and peace-loving we are but have in fact been on the offensive now for quite some time and are still hoping and/or pretending that you haven’t noticed it yet kind of calls. It’s just one big giant Verarschung (farse, gag) and would be funny if it wasn’t so, well, funny.

“Openly exploring theological and philosophical opinions in public is one thing,” said one anonymous and enraged Muslim leader/Imam/illiterate (take your pick) who called up the Pope in the middle of the night last night in rage. “But you can never say anything that we don’t agree with. Otherwise we will behead you. This is because we are a religion of peace. Please get this straight. Otherwise we’re going to get a “peace” of you, know what I’m sayin’? We’ll organize another Ali Agca incident or something. Alles klar?” Click.

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