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BNN News Archive Page
       Sunday, February 26, 2006

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CHINA CAN EXPECT TO ENJOY MORE FREEDOM DUE TO GOOGLE (HUMOR)

By Lonnie Hodge

GOOGLES

Seems Google published medical records online: WIRED MAGAZINE carried the story. It seems Google is a hacker's and deviant's best tool. Apple, the security freaks (I really DO love MAC), ended up having published, entire databases with addresses, phone numbers and detailed biographies of several hundred teachers affiliated with Apple Computer. It also included each teacher's user name and password.

Drexel University College of Medicine got bagged for 5,500 medical records of neurosurgical patients. The patient records included addresses, telephone numbers and detailed write-ups of diseases and treatments. Once Google pointed the visitor to the page, the hacker merely needed to type in an identical user name and password (in short, the name of the database) in order to access the information. Now everyone knows about that lobotomy.

One of the other problems with Google's algorithm is that is pushes items to the top ranks in their search results that may not have been looked at in years. If someone with a name similar to yours ends up with a case indexed on one of the high rankled law research sites ( so many lawyers, so little crime) you are going to come up first for your name and it will be in a case file on a guy in Spiderbreath, Montana who married six wives and a sheep in a cult ceremony just before the Feds shot his sheep in a standoff.

Do you want to really spank an old adversary? Pay for fake hits, or get a friend with a server and an easy script, and drive traffic to that municipal case review of his 30 years ago when he urinated in public after a beer bash at his frat' house. Yep, it works.

And do not ask the law sites to help you out. It is WAY too much effort to put a simple search exclusion tag on a harmful entry. I feel a class action suit coming...

YES, this is a serious issue. And I hope some sites devoted to slicing and dicing Google and Civil Liberty blogs take up the gauntlet. I hope the recent media attention has them looking at ways to correct the problem provided they are not busy dodging bullets from the recent "Chinagate" assaults.

Here is a silly way to see how you might get viewed by someone "Googling" (I love writing that) you. My mom said you had to laugh to keep from crying sometimes. So, I came across a site that will search your name and give you indexed header (lower case) returns for it. Some are pretty hilarious. I have included only a few of mine for you.

And Tomorrow I am going to show you how syndication can produce ridiculous results: I plan to make Instapundit Glenn Reynold's name come up #1 in the engines for Instant Pudding. Stay tuned.

Here are my returns for the site Googlisms.
GOOGLISM ( parenteses are mine) :

lonnie is tongue
( I think they meant mouth)
lonnie is totally aware of what went wrong
(It all started with that plane flight to Beijing)
lonnie is a well built young man who appears to be in his early twenties
(FROM the early twenties)
lonnie is not limited to his diddley bow
(Or Cialis)
lonnie is a sought
(Misspelled sot?)
lonnie is from new hampshire and angela is from west virginia
(If the both got in a plane at 600 miles per hour. where over the Pacfic would the planes intersect?)
lonnie is entering his eleventh year at david douglas
(f this is a school I COULD still be enrolled)
lonnie is a good athlete who can get up and down the floor
(No, a former althlete who can barely get out of bed or off the floor)
lonnie is a volunteer for the smart program
(Get it where and when you can!)
lonnie is preserving an art form created by his family for of years
(Making aluminium TV dinner lates, my mother LOVED so dearly, into UFO protection hats)
lonnie is possessed by a demon
(Blogging)
lonnie is especially painful
(when he is trying to be funny)
lonnie is a big
(In aboriginal and Pygmie areas and just average in Asia)
lonnie is no longer with us
(It happened about 1970 I think)
lonnie is supported by temp'ing for the law firm of twit and bell
(Yes, I help the twit)
lonnie is a hammond
(That is no way to talk about my organ)
lonnie is nuts
(I rest my case or the twit will for me)

AND GOOGLES




Lonnie Hodge nurtures his China Blog at: ONEMANBANDWIDTH



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posted by Lonnie at 2:12 AM  

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