German officials where shocked to discover today that an estimated three dozen German citizens are still interested in news reports concerning the fate of a handful of 70’s leftist radicals who, if not already long out of prison, will be released within the next few months no matter what anyway.

“We’ve gotten lots of phone calls recently from people who actually knew who these people were, I mean, are,” said a thoroughly annoyed and unnamed justice official. “I mean, that we have to pretend as if we care about releasing unrepentant and boring murderers like that is one thing, but why should anyone else give a damn? These terrorists are about as interesting as a warm gulp of water. After all, they only killed thirty-four people in all. What is that in today’s world? And all thirty-four of them were bourgeois Spießer (squares) working for our oppressive capitalist state, too. You know, like me. And after all, five life sentences are five life sentences. For each guy, I mean. Fair is fair. So like let’s move on already.”

“Yeah,” added his colleague. “Whether this Klar guy killed Buback or Wisniewski did, like what does it matter now? Klar is on his way out and Wisniewski already is. Who cares if this could have any influence on Klar’s plea for clemency or not? He’ll be coming out next year automatically anyway. Go get a life. A life sentence, I mean. Ha, ha, ha.”

“And actually, it’s probably less than three dozen people after all, you know” said the first guy, cheering up a bit. “Half the folks I spoke with thought that RAF meant Royal Air Force.” 

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