Internet dating.  The very thought of it might send chills down your dateless spine, but for many single men and women, it has become a way of life.  No one wants to be lonely and Cherie Burbach, author of Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza, is here with us today to give us some Internet dating pointers to alleviate that fear we might have for finding that someone special online.

Thank you for this interview, Cherie.  Can we begin by asking how you got started in the Internet dating biz?

Cherie BurbachI did Internet dating myself a few years ago, and thought it was a great way to get introduced to other like-minded singles.  I met over 60 guys for coffee and conversation in just six months, and one of them turned out to be the guy I would marry just one year later. 

I wrote a book about my experienced entitled At the Coffee Shop.  After that I became an online dating columnist, feature writer, Internet dating consultant.  Now, I get hundreds of emails from daters asking questions about how to email someone, how to write a profile, and even how to end a date. 

In your experience, do you think people are afraid to find someone dating online because of the stigma behind it?

Absolutely!  Internet daters get a bad rap from some people.  One reason I enjoy working with them is because I know exactly what they are going through.  So while others may snigger when someone is Internet dating, I believe the Internet dater is actually doing the smart thing and trying to find the right person for them. 

Internet dating can also be intimidating at first.  Some people do their best to make it work but never really go in with the right tools, attitude, or approach.  Those are the ones that usually give up.

How can your book, Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza, help to alleviate that fear?

My book has several concrete examples on how to write a profile that will showcase your personality.  Most people don’t put up a profile that benefits them, and then they wonder why they either get “the wrong kind of responses” or worse, none at all. 

It’s hard just to listen to advice on what to do.  That’s why I help show someone through examples on what to say, how to describe things, and even how to email someone you’re interested in.

Let’s say someone has decided to go for it.  Can you give her some pointers on setting up a profile that will get positive responses?

First of all, don’t rush through your profile.  Take the time to answer every question on your profile.  Put up a recent picture that perfectly displays your face.  If you don’t have one, grab a digital camera and hop to it! 

Most importantly, describe things in your profile rather than list them.  This will help showcase your personality.

What should we be looking for when they respond to our ads?  Are there any warning signs we should look out for?

Anyone who immediately gives you their phone on the first email because they “want to get around the email system” is a red flag.  Never give money to anyone, no matter how convincing their story.  Watch out for people that for whatever reason give you the creeps.  Perhaps it’s the questions they ask or the things they say.  If you feel weird about them, don’t talk yourself out of that feeling just to be polite.

Of all the online dating websites out there, do you have one you’d like to recommend?  Or are they all basically the same?

There are a lot of great sites out there, and I’ve talked to Internet daters who have met someone special on just about every one.  I think your approach and attitude matters more than the site itself.

What do you feel the advantages are to finding someone through the Internet over waiting for that prince in shining armor to find you offline?

I’ll use my own example here.  After we got married, my husband and I had found out that we had hung out at several of the same places over the years.  We had very similar interests and had probably bumped into each other several times without realizing it.  Yet we had never met.

The Internet gives you the opportunity to get introduced to someone who is probably right in your neighborhood and you’d never realized you had so much in common with.

Thank you so much for this interview, Cherie.  Do you have any final words? 

Thanks for the opportunity to talk to your readers.  My final advice is to never get discouraged.  If you keep Internet dating the right way, you will probably meet someone special. 

For more information about me, please visit my website:  www.cherieburbach.com.

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