So I have decided to try a little something new â€“ reviewing some of the movies I see in theaters that I won’t have the chance to review on DVD.Â And, two days ago, I drug myself and some friends to a new movie.Â See, one of my friends hates scary movies.Â She couldn’t even finish watching The Sixth Sense.Â So, I figured we could go and see one of the trilogy of horror films coming out in the next couple of weeks.Â It was between Shutter (which I thought looked way too much like The Grudge to respect as an actual film), The Ruins (which, based on the trailers I had seen), and Prom Night or whatever it’s called (this looked too much like just another stupid slasher flick).Â So after weeks of cajoling, my friend agreed to go see a movie with me.Â We chose The Ruins.
Starting April 4th, The Ruins is now in theaters nationwide, ready for you and all your enjoyment.
The Ruins is the story of four friends and the two people they meet on their vacation down in Mexico.Â They get a chance to visit some previously undiscovered Mayan ruins and set off to do so.Â Once they get there, some natives arrive and begin screaming at the tourists.Â When one of them accidentally steps in the vines covering the temple, the natives shoot one of them and force the rest up them up the ruins.Â When one of them falls down the center of the temple, the rest must help him.Â Down in the ruins, they discover something trying to kill them.
I read that the best comparison for this film would be Touristas meets The Descent.Â In retrospect, that seems to be a little generous.Â Although headed up by a wonderful performance from Jena Malone, the entire plot of this film is dead on arrival.Â The film is not interesting.Â Horror movies usually are not.Â This one isn’t even scary.Â I’m even going to go ahead and spoil the movie because the central idea is so bad.Â The thing which is coming to kill them in the ruins?Â In the trailer, the thing which sneaks up behind one of the characters looks to be a person of some sort.Â Perhaps it is an evil spirit, or some sort of crazed native, or even a crazy murderer would be welcome at this point.Â But what is it which seeks to kill them?Â A plant.Â How in the world is that supposed to be scary?Â I have one on my desk as I’m writing this.Â It’s a terrible movie.
The Ruins should be left to rot alone.