After witnessing the recent nervous breakdown of a 17-year-old contestant on Germany’s way too popular Deutschland Sucht den Superstar (Germany Seeks Its Superstar or DSDS or even ADSDS, ADS + DSDS, get it, ha, ha? OK, Germany’s version of American Idol), German military strategists in northern Afghanistan, clearly worried about their current no-win situation among NATO partners regarding their less than impressive role there, and desperate to prove their military prowess, have boldly proposed broadcasting the program to Taliban forces in the far, far, way down there below in that there southern part of the country.

“We believe that such malicious disregard for humanity on a so-called talent show like this, not to mention its atrocious level of media brutality and the socio-political irresponsibility it represents, will decimate enemy forces nowhere near us who happen to watch the program, or at least make them change channels repeatedly, which will frustrate them considerably and possibly even deprive them of their will to fight others who of course will not be us” said a spokesman for the forces.

The most dangerous, early episodes of DSDS are the ones to be used, those in which the unfortunate candidates who clearly do not have “the right stuff” are mercilessly ripped to shreds by what are supposed to be three talented judges, even though Dieter Bohlen is among them and clearly the leader of the pack and I have absolutely no intention of even thinking about going there right now.

American commanders are not yet convinced that the use of such high-tech weaponry of mass media destruction is advisable at the present moment as it could provoke the enemy to broadcast similar shows back in their friggin’ direction so forget about it.

Purposely humiliate untalented candidates? Us? No way. Or way?

Come visit me at Observing Hermann…

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