Pointing out that Germany is doing everything it can with its contingent of 3,200 soldiers in northern Afghanistan, a spokesman in Berlin has reacted testily to a request by Washington to send more forces to the war zones in the southern part of the country by saying “We’re doing everything we can.”

While tens of thousands of American, British, Canadian, Dutch, French and you-name-it other troops are doing everything they can by actually fighting the Taliban in the south – the Canadians are even now threatening to withdraw due to particularly heavy loses (as in deaths) and a lack of reinforcements from other NATO countries, for instance - Germany continues to insist upon doing everything it can at a higher and noticeably quieter Afghan latitude level.

When asked by a reporter what the other 250,000 troops in the German military are doing back home at the moment and if it might not maybe be possible to dig up one or two hundred of them with guns and ammunition and everything who might not sort of perhaps consider kind of like coming down south to fight for a week or two tops pretty please, the angered spokesman said “We’re doing everything we can, I say. Not everything we should or even could, but can. Three letters here; c, a, and n. Got that? I can’t stress the word can enough.”

Observers of the Berlin political scene believe that by saying no to Washington, Berlin has successfully punktetetete (racked up points) yet again with its ever-concerned, hand-wringing citizenry on the street and elsewhere who really, really, hate war and bloodshed and badness and unpleasantness everywhere in the world (no one else in the world does, they assume) and who now have established a real tradition here of pretending to fight for something while cleverly letting others do the fighting for them and who then pull off the acrobatic feat of feeling morally superior all at the same time without ever even turning red in the face in the process, once.

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