â€œFilthâ€, Madonnaâ€™s autobiographical masterpiece and debut movie as a director, is set to premiere at the annual Berlinale or Berlin film festival to be held in February here in Berlin, of all places, organizers said. Then said organizers told me that the title of the movie is actually â€œFilth and Wisdomâ€ so I guess it isnâ€™t autobiographical after all. Sorry, but this is a developing story you know.
“As far as central European cities go, Berlin is one of the filthiest places I can think of,â€ said the nasty star when asked by a sleazy reporter during a cruddy press conference in grimy old London recently. â€œSo what better a place to premier a trashy Drecksfilm (filthy movie) like mine? Like, have you ever seen all the dog bombs on the streets in that town? Sheesh.â€
The 49-year-old at the very least singer-dancer-blasphemy-marketer-stripper-pornographer-nasty-Micky-Mouse-on-helium-voice-impersonator will â€œairâ€ her putrefied film outside of the main competition because she doesnâ€™t have a chance in hell to win there anyway, somebody said. The festival’s smutty and excrement-encrusted Panorama section is the more appropriate venue, organizers have announced.
It is not clear at this point in time whether or not the scuzzy star will fly in for the premierÂ as her arms are tired and she also suffers from a Stauballergie (dust or dreck allergy) and Berlin is the last place on earth you want to go to then folks, other than London, maybe.
Wow, what a masterpiece of you-know-what.
Come visit me at Observing Hermann…