In Germany? How is that supposed to work if nobody here even works until 65 now? Well, that’s not quite true. Some really, really clever investigative journalists and/or scientific study people did some groundbreaking research and discovered something that apparently no one in Germany had been aware of up until now for some inexplicable reason: Only 5 percent of the working population in Germany ever makes it to the official retirement age of 65 before retiring.

This is the land of early retirement, in other words. Germans actually start retiring with 55 and the fewest of them stick it out until they are 60. Only die Dummen (the dummies) work as long as they are supposed to work. So what does the German government do about this unacceptable situation that is actually perfectly acceptable but nobody is allowed to admit it? They introduce a retirement age of 67.

No, think about it. This is more clever than you think (it has to be). By slowly phasing in an official retirement age of 67, this will get the people beginning to retire now with 55 to work two years longer and begin their early retirement only after they have turned 57. The others who used to retire with 60 will then stick it out until 62. And of course only die Dummen will work until they are 65. Needless to say, nobody will be stupid enough to actually have to work until 67.

It is a rather complex sort-of-solution, I admit, but this is Germany, after all. What else could the government possibly do here? If you just explained to the people that they won’t get a cent until they reach the age of 65 (or 67), no exceptions, well, that would be too simple a solution for such a complex social issue and they just simply wouldn’t understand.

You’re old and grey and in the way.

Come visit me at Observing Hermann…

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