truth be told i have a strong, honest and opinionated voice that certainly was not heard nor appreciated in a family of six males (including my sexist father) when i was growing up….i guess he lead the way passing on what his generation and family had left him. i was endlessly told to shush, shut up and even got hands raised inches from my mouth should i even dare to begin to open it and speak.

since my father died last summer an issue arose and i decided i absolutely had to finally speak from my heart to my remaining siblings about this emotional legacy of my father’s that was generations old, but i knew that i had to work on making my delivery one that could be heard. this meant that i had to learn to deliver the truth in a balanced way, very consciously calming my emotions and balancing the message using both head and heart - also confident and firm that what i was seeking and attempting to deliver was the truth. without a doubt this was bloody hard work because my repressed emotions ran deep and were massively wounded. but somehow my message got through to some of my brothers and was it heard and in turn made a huge change in our dynamics. i was shocked. i have since reflected on what worked. yes strident is a revolting word and one of the all too many put down labels that our patriarchal, sexist and misogynist society feels it has to employ in order to rule with power and keep oppressing the scary and grossly misunderstood spirit of the feminine.

one point about this that cannot be over emphasised here, is that this is NOT a gender issue but one of much too much masculine energy squishing and repelling the feminine which now that it is determined to be heard once and for all, does tend to come out explosively because of those countless layers of oppression. this eruption of potent energy while desperate to be heard, sadly tends to have the opposite effect by triggering all sorts of defence mechanisms and put downs by those who, though they absolutely need to hear it, adamantly refuse to because they feel under attack. if the feminine is to be explored as a counter energy to too much masculine, let’s not have to see the pendulum swing all the way from one side to the other, just because voices need to be heard, but instead those getting in touch with the feminine within themselves might try instead to employ forgiveness and compassion of self first so as to have that pendulum rest in the healing middle ground where no, one, energy is expressed in such a way as to alienate.

we all need to learn a new way, to evolve creatively and each of us could begin by going inside for that attention and forgiveness we think we need externally. what might then be born is a truth expressed with less hurt and anger and delivered in a such a way that can be heard and in such a way that initiates constructive and healing dialogue.
PEACE