Outrageous. Shocking. It can’t happen in Germany but it did anyway. A Bulgarian woman left the competition’s behinds behind in Munich yesterday and won the coveted title of Most Beautiful Behind in the World.

Butt what about Germany, you assk? Ends up that the two German contestants (four cheeks) had to take a back seat to the 28 other competing countries. A real bummer for a nation so clearly obsessed with the past, I mean, behind. And that gets us to the bottom of the problem.

My haunch is that the German contestants, like so many of their compatriots out there, were too busy moralizing about the posterior to properly concentrate upon what is behind them right now. And this is what led to their early end. It all gets back to Germany’s lack of old-fashioned rearing, I assume. It’s a sad tail, but true. You know, turn the other cheek and all that?

Fanny thing is that the Germans will never fesse up this.

Come visit me at Observing Hermann…

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