Germans just have this thing with the autobahn. They really do. For young and old alike it’s a no-win situation really, whenever they start discussing it that is (although driving on them can also be a big pain in the autobahn, too). Just ask Eva Herman. She recently used the A-word directly after using the N-word and got into a big heap of trouble. And she’s not even eighty-one years old and driving around in a wheelchair yet.

But the old lady who wanted to visit a cemetery yesterday was. She got lost and decided to take a shortcut over the autobahn to get there and all the drivers she was passing by who must have been locked up in a Stau (traffic jam) got mad as hell about this and called in the cops on her.

The cops escorted her to the nearest exit were they wished her a nice day and reminded her that she should never do this again as the minimum driving speed a vehicle must be able to do on a German A-word is sixty kilometers per hour. And this made me laugh out loud because, traffic jam or not, nobody in Germany drives a mere sixty kilometers an hour, never ever, unless maybe they have been buried at that cemetery the old lady wanted to pay a visit to. Parked German cars do more than sixty kilometers an hour here. Or they at least certainly give one that impression. Well they do me.

So stay off the A-word with your wheelchair or motorized vehicle when paying your next cemetery visit. There is no sense in going nowhere fast. Or not fast enough, I mean. Whatever.

Come visit me at Observing Hermann…

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